Thanksgiving is an interesting holiday. Some celebrate it as an American tradition. Others look at it as simply an excuse to get together with family to watch some football. And still others just enjoy getting an extra day off from work or try to ignore it altogether. But however you regard it, there are often two areas in which many of us can use help: preparing the traditional Thanksgiving meal and dealing with the stresses that a family get-together can create — especially these days, when conversations around the dinner table may be even more fraught than usual.
Here are some of the strategies that the staff of The Verge use to negotiate holiday meals to help you keep your head together around family and friends.
Kill them with kindness fat and sugar
I started getting into cooking about a decade ago, and since then have felt uncomfortable rolling up to a party empty-handed. Instead, I go on the caloric offensive. Thanksgiving means bringing a double batch of Millie Peartree’s Southern Macaroni and Cheese, courtesy of The New York Times. It’s food coma-inducing (I’m using three pounds of cheese here, folks), but it is a once-a-year sorta thing.
Truth be told, I’m more of a baker at heart, so I generally rotate the dessert I bring to Thanksgiving and the holidays. I might finally take on a Bûche De Noël if I feel ambitious, and will use Sally McKenney’s recipe if I do. I’m for sure making Lan Lam’s Cranberry Curd Tart with Almond Crust from America’s Test Kitchen and Emergency Chocolate Cake from Milk Street — this is somewhat ironic given the history of those two sites. Both recipes are locked behind paywalls, but there are full video tutorials if you’d like to take them on.
And if you hate cooking and baking, there are no rules against picking up something premade from a bakery or supermarket, or using a boxed mix. — Brandt Ranj, commerce writer
Get an old-fashioned mixer
I spent years toiling over mixing bowls during the holidays, my arm left burning after slogging through dense cookie dough with a wooden spoon. But then, I received a hand-me-down KitchenAid Stand Mixer, and it’s been a lifesaver for making just about anything for holiday gatherings: cookies, pies, bread, and even meatballs. My model comes with a couple of different attachments, including a whisk, a flat beater, and a dough hook, all of which make it a heck of a lot easier to get through whatever I’m making. AlI I have to do is toss in my ingredients, choose a speed, and watch the KitchenAid get the job done in half the time it would take me by hand. — Emma Roth, news writer
Make Blue Apron your copilot
I cooked a full holiday meal for a small group a few years ago with the help of Blue Apron and it was a big success. You don’t have to be a member to order meals anymore, and you can pick and choose from mains, sides, and desserts for the holiday meals. It all gets shipped to you with the exact quantities of the ingredients you’ll need along with step-by-step instructions. I appreciated the details about what I could do ahead of time and when. The results were supertasty and I felt so accomplished. — Allison Johnson, senior reviewer
Canned pumpkin is not cheating — much
Every Thanksgiving, my partner and I would bring a side dish and a couple of pumpkin pies to the family feast. In the beginning, we were under the impression that it was better to make the pie from scratch (well, sort of scratch — we didn’t create the crust). So every year we’d buy a pumpkin, open it up, scrape it out, remove the seeds… It was quite a production. It also took a lot of time, and sometimes we had to run to the store because we ended up with not enough for the two pies.
Then one day my partner found an article in one of his cooking magazines that basically said, “Hey! Canned pumpkin is fine! Nothing is wrong with it — it’s just easier.”
We were doubtful at first, but it had been a busy year, so we decided to try it. And, yes! The pies came out fine. We still got a lot of compliments. And we were a lot less stressed. — Barbara Krasnoff, reviews editor
Give your family a Love Letter
Board games are a great way to have fun and also distract family members from potentially troublesome discussions. But instead of dusting off that box of Monopoly or Parcheesi, check out Love Letter. It’s the perfect intro to designer tabletop games, because it’s easy to learn, you can start playing in under 10 minutes, and rounds end nearly just as fast — giving people plenty of on and off ramps if they want to join in or bow out.
Love Letter is built around counting and tracking cards in a very small deck. You only get a couple of cards at a time, and each one does a simple task that can knock your opponents (or yourself) out in seconds. And it comes in fun licensed versions, like Marvel comics, Star Wars, and Bridgerton. — Antonio G. Di Benedetto, reviewer
Charge yourself and your devices
Look, the truth is, I get through Thanksgiving with nicotine in my lip. But I also tend to forget lots of things when I travel with my kids. To try to avoid that, I use the Ku Xiu Qi 2.2 foldable charging station, the best 3-in-1 charger I’ve used yet. I bought it after my colleague, Thomas Ricker, reviewed it in September and sang its praises. It offers up to 25-watt wireless charging, an Apple Watch puck, and a third pad for my AirPods. All juice up at the same time. No more forgetting chargers.
So now, I just make sure I have this Baseus retractable cable (recommended by David Pierce) in my bag, a single USB-C brick, and the Ku Xiu. — Todd Haselton, deputy editor
The number-one thing that’s made my holiday season more pleasant was understanding that it was actually okay to walk away from family relationships that only cause you pain. There are many reasons why that isn’t an option for many people. But I am fortunate enough to not have any financial dependence to worry about. There were several family members who caused me no end of grief over being transgender, and I learned to be okay letting those relationships go.
I spend the holidays with the family who actually loves me, and I don’t talk to the ones who don’t. — Ursa Wright, editor, Decoder
Be the family photographer
If you’re a little socially awkward, hiding behind a camera can be very effective. It’s slightly risky, because an annoying uncle or aunt may ask you, “Oh take this!” or “Get one of so-and-so!” or “Isn’t that cute? Get a picture!” But it usually works out as a net positive, allowing you to drift from room to room or out of certain situations. Is Uncle MAGA sounding off about something again? Well, the nieces and nephews are playing hide-and-seek in the other room, and that treasurable family moment really should be documented.
The other downside is you may be asked to send or post pictures for family members, but that also puts you in their good graces (if you care to be a people-pleaser). And those same photos make easy gifts later on.
— Antonio G. Di Benedetto, reviewer
When I need to de-stress from the holidays, I go on a walk. It has multiple benefits. I get to breathe fresh air and touch grass. I get some exercise to help burn off whatever baked goods I’ve eaten too much of. I can go buy myself a hot drink. And it’s easy and fun to do in a group, if you need something to get everyone off the couch.
Maybe I’ll take a walk right now. — Jay Peters, senior reporter
